Ein Mann namens Ove - ein Roman von Fredrik Backmann, in dem es ums Verzeihen geht.

Ein Mann namens Ove und Upeksa – das Verzeihen

Es gibt einen wunderschönen Film, basierend auf dem Buch: Ein Mann namens Ove. Da sieht man diesen Ove, wie er durch seine Siedlung in Schweden geht und die ganze Nachbarschaft tyrannisiert. Er ist kleinkariert, führt sich unmöglich auf, mischt sich in alles ein, die Nachbarn hassen ihn.

Den Oves zusehen

Und dann, nach und nach, lernt man Ove besser kennen, diesen zunächst so unsympatischen Mann. Der Zuschauer erfährt, wie er heute lebt, er erfährt seine Geschichte, man blickt immer tiefer in das Seelenleben dieses Mannes, versteht immer mehr, wie er so werden konnte, man gibt ihm eine Chance. Und mit der Chance fängt er an, sich ein bisschen zu verändern.

Ein Mann namens Ove - ein Roman von Fredrik Backmann, in dem es ums Verzeihen geht.
Im Buch „Ein Mann namens Ove“ geht es um das Verzeihen. Foto: Screenshot, Screenshot von „Ein Mann namens Ove“ von Fredrik Backmann, erschienen im Verlag FISCHER Krüger

Im Moment laufen da draußen viele Oves rum, Menschen voller Wut, voller Enttäuschung und Frust. Man wird leicht zum Ove in diesen Zeiten und das hat für uns zwei Folgen. Wir müssen aufpassen, dass wir den Oves um uns herum nicht mit genauso viel Wut und Unverständnis begegnen, wie sie uns begegnen; denn das führt unweigerlich zu immer noch mehr Wut. Und deswegen müssen wir mindestens genauso darauf aufpassen, dass wir dem Ove in uns selbst nicht zu viel Raum geben, dem unzufriedenen Stänkerer und Besserwisser.

Verständnisvolles Abstandhalten von den Oves innen und außen

Wie soll das gehen, wenn doch gerade so viel verquer läuft? Das Yoga Sutra kennt vier Werkzeuge, die uns in solchen Situationen helfen, die bhavana. Und mit denen möchte ich mich in den kommenden Online-Einheiten beschäftigen.

Als erstes picke ich uns das bhavana upeksa heraus: Upeksa heißt: verständnisvolles Abstandhalten, vergebungsvolles Hinschauen – so wie in dem Film „Ein Mann namens Ove“. Der Film schaut Ove genau zu in all seinen Schrulligkeiten und Unfreundlichkeiten. Er entschuldigt dieses Verhalten nicht, aber er verurteilt Ove dafür auch nicht. Er schaut ihm weiter zu, mit Geduld, mit Verständnis.

Diese Herangehensweise funktioniert mit den Oves außerhalb, sie funktioniert aber auch mit dem Ove in einem selbst – wenn wir uns nur daran erinnern. Geduldiges Hinschauen, sehen, wie der andere sich verhält, das Ganze sehen, sehen wie man selbst sich verhält, sehen, wie man sich dabei fühlt. Das üben wir in meinen Yogastunden – durchschnaufen, hinsehen, sich öffnen und gleichzeitig bei sich selbst bleiben; die eigenen inneren Wellen deeskalieren, die Wellen, die von außen an uns heranschwappen, auslaufen lassen, statt ihnen Felsblöcke entgegen zu werfen. Gerade in diesen Zeiten.

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